Why letting your fear surface is the secret to your success

Take a moment before you read any further. To get the most of today’s message, you need to be ready to dig deep.

When you’re ready, ask yourself this:

What tangible goal have you been wanting to tackle for quite some time—but haven’t?

Now think about why you haven’t taken action yet.

Is there a wall of mental resistance that’s holding you back?

Often, that resistance isn’t laziness or lack of motivation—it’s fear. Specifically, it’s the imagined discomfort that we think we’ll have to face if we try to change. It’s that sneaky brain again, trying to keep us safe so we don’t push outside of our comfort zone, where there’s risk.

But here’s the powerful shift:

Once you name the fear, you can use it. You no longer have to avoid the things that scare you. Instead, you can use your fear to build a plan that honours it.

And when you do, what felt impossible becomes manageable.

Take my client Deborah. After a health scare last year, she became focused on improving her health through nutrition and movement. She’s made several inspiring changes—but one goal kept getting pushed aside. That goal was to work out at an unfamiliar gym while she was traveling.

You might think, “What’s the big deal? Just get in there and get it done!” But Deborah hadn’t worked out solo in years and the thought of walking into a busy, unfamiliar gym full of strangers was overwhelming.

So, we peeled back the layers of resistance. She realized the fear wasn’t about the workout itself—it was about feeling out of place. That insight allowed her to find a solution: start with something familiar. She chose the treadmill, where she felt confident, and used her first session to simply observe the space, the people, and the vibe. No pressure. No expectations.

The lesson here is that fear is not the enemy. When you stop fighting it and instead, listen to it and embrace it, you can use it as an ally. Fear simply becomes data and data is what you need to become strategic.

And that’s exactly how another client, Mandy, overcame her resistance to planning and organizing her meals.

In dissecting her mental resistance, she named the fear that was immobilizing her. It had two parts. First, she didn’t want food prep to take up the better part of a day each week because she didn't want to miss out on spontaneous opportunities. And secondly, she didn’t want to feel overwhelmed by the food prep process.

Once she realized that fear was standing in the way of taking action, a solution immediately came to mind. She committed to just 20-30 minutes a day where she would prioritize food prep, instead of committing to a big, daunting block of time. Then, she created a short list of food prep tasks to stay on top of so she knew exactly what needed to be done.

Simple. Repeatable. Zero overwhelm.

A third client had a similar breakthrough recently. Trisha came to me terrified that making nutrition changes would leave her starving. She’d done the Weight Watcher’s point system back in the day and while it had been effective, she’d been hungry all the time.

Naming her fear changed everything. The solution? Create a system where she felt full, satisfied, and energized—not restricted. We focused on protein, fiber-rich foods, and predictable mealtimes aligned with her natural hunger cues.

And just like it had with Deborah and Mandy, digging into her fear helped Trisha build a blueprint.

Now, let’s turn things back to you. If these stories resonate and you’re ready to peel back the layers of your mental resistance to build your own blueprint, try working your way through this exercise:

Step 1: Identify your goal

➡️ What’s one goal that you’ve been wanting to achieve for awhile—but haven’t started?

Example:

• I want to improve my eating habits, so I have more energy throughout the day and feel more in control of my nutrition.

Step 2: Identify what’s holding you back

➡️ What fears or worries come up when you imagine taking action toward this goal?

💡TIP: Set a timer for 5 minutes. Brainstorm a list of fears. Each time you pause, ask “What else?” Keep going until the timer ends.

Example:

• I don’t want to feel hungry and deprived

• I’m afraid I won’t be able to eat my favourite foods ever again

• I’m afraid I’ll fail

• I’m afraid I won’t know what to eat

• I’m afraid that focusing on my nutrition will take over my life

Step 3: Use your fear to create a blueprint for action

➡️ Create two columns. In column one, list the fears you brainstormed above. In column two, brainstorm possible solutions for each fear

Example: 

• I don’t want to feel hungry and deprived ➡️ Feel satisfied by including protein, fiber, and healthy fats with each meal and snack

• I’m afraid I won’t be able to eat my favourite foods ever again ➡️ Allow flexibility: include favourite snacks or meals regularly

• I’m afraid I’ll fail ➡️ Track and celebrate consistent habits, not the number on the scale

Step 4: Take fear-informed action

➡️ What are 2-4 actions you can take that help you move forward, without triggering the fear?

Example:

• Add one fist-size serving of vegetables to lunch and dinner — not removing anything, just adding

• Meal plan for 3 days only to reduce overwhelm and allow flexibility

• Include a favorite snack or treat each day to avoid the feeling of restriction

• Reflect each Friday on what worked, what felt good, what can be done consistently, and adjust from there

By working your way through these questions, you can:

✅Identify where fear has been holding you back from pursuing a goal that’s important to you

✅Begin to understand exactly what’s standing in the way of taking action

✅Help you find a simple path so that you will move forward

All while honouring both your goals and your emotional safety. ⬅️This is how you thrive!

📩Did something here give you insight or lighten your mental load? If so, can you think of a friend, colleague, or family member that would also have a better day because of it? Consider sharing the link with them—you never know whose day you might help shift for the better.